My story is an easy one to tell. I married too young, fell out of love with my husband when he cheated on me, and decided to leave when our daughter was an infant. I had found out he was cheating on me when I was 5 months pregnant, but I decided to try and stick it out in the hopes that things would improve. They didn’t, and one night when he was screaming at me in front of our daughter, I decided I couldn’t take it anymore. So I left. He has narcissistic personality traits and it’s difficult to be in a relationship with someone who only thinks and cares about themselves.
Our divorce was amicable, and took just a couple of months to complete. I agreed to joint custody, because I was hoping he would be a better father than he was a husband. I didn’t ask for my half of the house, even though by law I was entitled to it. I gave it to him, hoping he would continue to raise our daughter in that house during his parenting time. I did not ask for child support, because I made more money and he was already paying child support for two other children from his first marriage. I knew that I could raise our daughter without any other outside financial help. We agreed on an almost 50/50 parenting time split, with me having 54% of the time and physical custody. We shared joint legal custody.
My ex and I communicated fairly well, until I got remarried 5 years after our divorce. He became jealous and felt intimidated by my husband, even though my husband is one of the nicest, sincere men you’ll ever meet. Our communication about our daughter started to take a nosedive, as he began ignoring phone calls and emails pertaining to her. I tried to be a decent ex-wife; I only contacted him when it was absolutely necessary regarding our daughter, and I supported his new relationship with his girlfriend 100%. Even though I’d only met her once, our daughter was deeply bonded to her and for that I was grateful. Who wouldn’t want another adult to love their child as must as they do? I felt comfort knowing his girlfriend would be there to help with our daughter during his parenting time with her.
Things really went south when my husband’s ex looked him up and contacted him two years ago. Imagine my surprise when I saw him standing outside our judge’s chambers with my husband’s ex, when we had to make an appearance for yet another motion she had filed against him. More on that story in another post…